Today a friend of mine shares some quotes as he usually does (on the way of trying to emulate gurus). The post basically advises people to “control emotions” for a better life. That people who act on emotions are immature and vice versa.
I feel sad to have to control or repress emotions. Humans are born to interact as social animals, and in that process we learn what’s acceptable and what not. Controling a certain emotion may save a certain unwanted outcome, but is also a trade off for mutual understanding.
Emotions will find their way to burst out sooner or later, so why control or repress anyway?
Furthermore, I don’t think emotion is something we can just force to disappear. We feel someway for some reason. Hiding, controlling, repressing a certain emotion without touching its root will not make it vanish.
For example if I am angry at you or jealous of you, it’s because I feel insecure (inferior). Forcing myself to not feel that way doesn’t work unless I trace back why I feel insecure/intimidated by you in the 1st place.
People tend to do so to protect an image or create distance, either for saving face or for fear of intimacy.
Unless your negative emotions seriously hurt an important relationship, it’s healthy to just release.
Or not? Is it right/healthy to just release?
Probably it should be changed into “not acting on impulse” rather than “controlling emotions”.