Rudeness for no reason

I feel uneasy when sb is too kind & friendly to me, even to the point of slashing rude words at them for no reason. The moment I acquire affection, I am done.

Maybe it’s just a psychological reaction. A coping mechanism. “Leave me alone by stop being too kind”

With family members I have to make a conscious effort to go against this. maybe just a matter of personal space. When u are too friendly you are willing to give part of this up. And be vulnerable & helpless, too.

I hate that.

This is a big problem in work & corporation. The moment sb tells me to do something, a feeling of obligation overwhelmes me and turns me off. Even when autonomy level is generous, can’t help feeling like a puppet pulled by a string. Yet, the moment I am not, I can work like a horse !

Still a child? I reckon.


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